Mintys Tips - Week 34: 2008/9 - Janet Street Porter
You are here: Football England > Football Betting Tips > Week 34: 2008-9 Season It was almost slightly irritating that Jimmy Tarbuck gave us a huge win of £91.52 last week, because as you know, when the Mint gets onto a good thing, he finds it difficult to let go... So, you'd expect Gap Toothed Tarbs to be picking them again this week?
Wrong! The idea was that I could get mentally angry with these scrotes and invent a pleasing way of dispatching them, to make me feel better when their bets failed. However, it is now giving me even more pleasure that the last 3 weeks guest pickers have been trying so hard to pick winners that it's actually bringing money in, and they're still getting killed off.
A stroke of genius. Tarbuck is now lying face down in a bath full of rum & raisin ice cream, and this week's guest picker in my head (keeping with the crap toothed theme) Janet Street Porter, must be shitting herself. What to do Janet?
Try and make Mint happy with a big win?
Think it'll save your fetid skin? Bet 1 : Toothy Grin
6 Homes - £0.10 Trebles & upwards - 42 bets(£4.20
Blackpool v Nottingham Forest - Blackpool @ 8/5
Bolton Wanderers v Aston Villa - Bolton Wanderers @ 7/4
Hull City v Liverpool - Hull City @ 8/1
Southampton v Burnley - Southampton @ 5/2
Huddersfield v Brighton & HA - Huddersfield @ 8/5
Oldham Ath v Southend Utd - Oldham Ath @ 8/5
Who do you think you are with your 42 bets, you mad bitch?...
Bet 2 : The Tube
6 aways - £0.10 Trebles & upwards - 42 bets(£4.20
Sheffield Utd v Swansea City - Swansea City @ 3/1
MK Dons v Walsall - Walsall @ 9/1
Tranmere Rov v Yeovil Town - Yeovil Town @ 6/1
Bournemouth v Grimsby Town - Grimsby Town @ 3/1
Bradford City v Rotherham Utd - Rotherham Utd @ 11/4
Gillingham v Bury - Bury @ 7/4
Jesus Christ, you 42 bet, dental freak.
Bumper prices there, but will they save you from a death worse than death? Bet 3 : Chomptastic
6 Scores - £0.10 Lucky 63 (£6.30)
Blackpool v Nottingham Forest - Blackpool 3-2 @ 25/1
Hull City v Liverpool - Hull City 3-2 @ 66/1
Bristol City v Sheffield Wednesday - Bristol City 4-2 @ 50/1
West Ham Utd v Chelsea - Draw 3-3 @ 50/1
Cardiff City v Ipswich Town - Cardiff City 4-2 @ 50/1
Millwall v Leyton Orient - Millwall 4-2 @ 50/1
I've never seen anything quite so ridiculous in my life.
And, you've had a massive toothy overspend there Janet, which I can just about let you get away with after Tarby's winnings last week. Mind you, I bet the Tote are shitting themselves, cos I just placed this online and their bet calculator predicted this: Potential returns: 1,342,412,697.50 I think they'll just have to give the Tote to Mint.
"'Cos Minty is a freaking billionaire"
Shaka Khan!
Mint.
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