Football England

Well... As the World Cup has started, I suppose it would only be fitting to drag ourselves out of the pub for a little while and get down to business here at Football England.

Follow all the matches here, and get the best and worst of World Cup 2010.

World Cup Chat Norbert reckons Rooney & Gerrard are brainless.

What a load of Shite

World Cup Match reports : Click the links below...

England 1 Germany 4
Utter bilge from our piss poor players.

Uruguay 2 South Korea 1
Uruguay become the first side through to the Quarter Finals.

England 1 Slovenia 0
Much better from our boys. Actually looked like a team for once.

Argentina 2 Greece 0
Impressive Argentina with maximum points. Greece out.

Nigeria 2 South Korea 2
S. Korea hang on to go through. Not enough goals for Nigeria.

France 1 South Africa 2
French Out! What a load of rubbish. S.A. go out with a win.

Mexico 0 Uruguay 1
Uruguay through with ease, but Mexico join them.

Portugal 7 North Korea 0
Portugal run riot as S. Korea capitulate.

Brazil 3 North Ivory Coast 1
Brazilians now looking smooth.

Football England's report on our second game:
Algeria 0 England 0
The most dismal display ever?

Germany 0 Serbia 1
The Germans are at it now. Jerry Beaten. Nice?

France 0 Mexico 2
The French have imploded. Easily beaten. Nice?

Argentina 4 South Korea 1
The Argies looking good under Diego.

South Africa 0 Uruguay 3
Home side going out? Very impressive form from the Uruguayans.

Spain 0 Switzerland 1
Favourites beaten. Fancy Dans beware.

Chile 1 Honduras 0
We like Chile. They look the business.

Brazil 2 North Korea 1
Brazil taking it easy?

New Zealand 1 Slovakia 1
Astounding late point from the All Whites. Considering how crap they are.

Italy 1 Paraguay 1
Shaky start from the holders. Good effort from the S. Americans.

Japan 1 Cameroon 0
Good engines those Japanese. Especially Honda.

Denmark 0 Holland 2
The Orange men get the ball rolling with a win. Not Convinced yet.

Aurtralia 0 Germany 4
Impressive stuff from the Jerries.

Ghana 1 Serbia 0
Nice win for Ghana in a less than inspiring match.

Algeria 0 Slovenia 1
What an awful game this was.

Football England's report on our first game:
England 1 USA 1
Great start, then went downhill. Carragher came on. Got worse.

Argentina 1 Nigeria 0
Easy enough for Maradona's men. Mind you - he does look like a tramp, doesn't he?

Greece 0 South Korea 2
Impressive win for the Underdogs?

Uruguay 0 France 0
A pretty unimpressive point for the Froggies, who frankly cheated to get there in the first place.

South Africa 1 Mexico 1
A good point for the home team in a nice enough opener.

And by the way. Emile Heskey is going to play against USA tonight.
And he's going to be magnificent.

Come on England!